07/01/2012
Letting Go of Abandonment
So this morning’s teaching was on freedom, and how it is a personal choice- of shifting our consciousness. And because of recent conversations (I think :), it came to mind that I am not yet free of abandonment issues. It’s not a fear for me per se, because I’m no longer paralyzed by it. I made a conscious decision several years ago to feel the fear and do it anyway, but it is still a struggle for me when it comes to romantic possibilities.
In thinking about this ailment, I think I must also think about the good it has done for me. Yes, good :), or I don’t think I would have held on to it as long as I have ;). So the good is I haven’t become emotionally attached to the unworthy, thereby thwarting my inevitable harm.
But is it possible to meet that same need for protection without the counterproductive presence of fear? I think so :)…By acknowledging that I am no longer the powerless young girl on whom the wounds were afflicted; by acknowledging I am no longer the unwise young woman of yesteryear or even yesterday (every moment I am different :). And finally, by recognizing that I no longer need to the fear/issue to protect me…because now I wear a shield of Love and wisdom, which deflects the efforts of those who would do me harm. This fear, this issue no longer serves me, and so I must set it down so I am freer, lighter as I continue on this wondrous journey of enlightenment.
…’Ahhhh,’ my spirit gratefully cries. ‘Thank you for lightening my load, for loosing me so I may soar. Thank you for giving me back my Freedom to be me.’
Wow. I am humbled. I am honored, and I am surprised that it was this easy to be free :).
Just be free, my friends. Just choose Love!!